Good, Bad & Ugly Review: Nurse 3-D

Rotten Tomatoes Rating: 69% (Critics) / 47% (Audience)
Directed By: Douglas Aarniokoski
Written By: Douglas Aarniokoski and David Loughery
Starring: Paz de la Huerta, Katrina Bowden, Judd Nelson and Corbin Bleu
Studio: The Film Arcade

Synopsis: By day Abby Russell is a dedicated nurse, someone you wouldn’t hesitate to trust your life with. But by night, her real work begins…using her smoldering sexuality she lures cheating men to their brutal deaths and exposes them for who they really are. When a younger nurse starts to suspect Abby’s actions and compromises her master plan, Abby must find a way to outsmart her long enough to bring the cheater you’d least expect to justice. – (Source)

The Good:
Paz de la Huerta seemed to get what this movie should have been striving for and that is mainly a fantastically campy disaster. Her bizarre affectations and exaggerated sultry movements were the wonderful things of a John Waters movie. She dove into this silliness with serious dedication. Of all the cast the only one who came even close to embracing the nonsense like de la Huerta was ex-Brat packer Judd Nelson whose lecherous doctor was just over-the-top enough to be funny.
And whoever made the decision to dress all of the female nurses like they were cast in a fetish porn needs to be commended.

The Bad:
None of the other actors seemed to be in on the joke though. The amount of bad overly earnest acting that Katrina Bowden and Corbin Bleu did was awful but not awful enough to be funny. So instead it was just two pretty mediocre actors attempting to act with a capital “A” in a movie that was begging to be goofy.

The Ugly
As bad as it was to have so many of the actors not realize that this movie should have been super campy fun it was even worse to realize that the director didn’t get it either. There were so many moments that came to the edge of camp nirvana but never took that final leap.

Final Verdict: A ridiculous movie that never fully embraced that ridiculousness, NURSE features a memorably wacky performance from its lead actress but no other part of the film ever quite rises up to her level of fuckery. You’d think a fetishized slasher movie about a psycho nurse by day and executioner of cheating men by night (with a sprinkle of a lesbian FATAL ATTRACTION thrown in for good measure) would be a lot more fun than this movie ended up being. Instead it ends up being something one would have expected to see air on Cinemax in the 1990s and starred Shannon Tweed. And the 3-D was totally unnecessary.

Grade: D+

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